Brown Leaves and White Paper

Bicycle day

On April 19, 1943 Dr. Albert Hofmann intentionally ingested 250 µg of LSD, which he hypothesized would be at most a threshold level dose, based on his research on other ergot alkaloids. Surprisingly, the substance showed a potency orders of magnitude above almost any other substance known at the time, amounting to a much heavier dose than typically given in modern therapeutic use. After ingesting the substanceHofmann found himself struggling to speak intelligibly and asked his laboratory assistant, who knew of the self-experiment, to escort him home on his bicycle, since wartime restrictions made automobiles unavailable. On the bicycle ride home,Hofmann's condition became more severe and in his journal he stated that everything in his field of vision wavered and was distorted, as if seen in a curved mirror.Hofmann also stated that while riding on the bicycle, he had the sensation of being stationary, unable to move from where he was, despite the fact that he was moving very rapidly. OnceHofmann arrived home, he summoned a doctor and asked his neighbor for milk, believing it might help relieve the symptoms. Hofmann wrote that despite his delirious and bewildered condition, he was able to choose milk as a nonspecific antidote for poisoning.

Upon arriving the attending doctor could find no abnormal physical symptoms other than extremely dilated pupils. After spending several hours terrified that his body had been possessed by a demon, that his next door neighbor was a witch, and that his furniture was threatening him, Dr.Hofmann feared he had become completely insane. In his journal Hofmann said that the doctor saw no reason to prescribe medication and instead sent him to his bed. At this time Hofmann said that the feelings of fear had started to give way to feelings of good fortune and gratitude, and that he was now enjoying the colors and plays of shapes that persisted behind his closed eyes.Hofmann mentions seeing "fantastic images" surging past him, alternating and opening and closing themselves into circles and spirals and finally exploding into colored fountains and then rearranging themselves in a constant flux.Hofmann mentions that during the condition every acoustic perception, such as the sound of a passing automobile, was transformed into optical perceptions. EventuallyHofmann slept and upon awakening the next morning felt refreshed and clearheaded, though somewhat physically tired. He also stated that he had a sensation of well being and renewed life and that his breakfast tasted unusually delicious. Upon walking in his garden he remarked that all of his senses were "vibrating in a condition of highest sensitivity, which then persisted for the entire day".

About eleven months ago, Chelli and I visited Amma and Nana. During some random conversation which for some reason diverted to smoking, Chelli asked Nana if he had ever smoked and if he had, how was it? Nana said that he had never smoked in his life, but that did not mean his children should not. We, according to him, were old enough to make our own decisions about such things in life. See? The person who matters much more than certain individuals seems to agree with us! In all these 22 years I spent with him, he never conducted a Shivir for me. Anyway, upon hearing that, Chelli asked Nana if she could try smoking. Nana told her he would get her a pack to try out and asked me if I wanted to join her. Silly me, I was expecting at least a quarter of the feelings that Dr. Hofmann experienced and gave him a nod.

That evening, Nana on his way back from office picked up a pack of Marlboro (He actually asked the salesman for the "safest" ones to try). Chelli as expected chickened out. I however decided to go ahead with it after dinner.

I took out one stick and started to tap one of its end on the packet like they show in the movies.

No sooner had I started, the cigarette got bent in the middle. I then remembered Varun scolding Rohith for "spoiling" a cigarette when he tried a similar thing.

I flung the "spoilt" one away, took out a second one, put it in my mouth and lit it.

Now what do I do? I once tried breathing in smoke from a lit paper rolled into a dummy cigarette I made in my fifth class (Thank you HPS!). The experience was horrible, which was probably why I hated cigarettes until I learned they caused lung cancer.

I drew some air into my mouth and exhaled immediately. I repeated this one more time and still nothing seemed to happen. Was I high already? Definitely not!

Maybe I should have let the smoke stay in my mouth for a while to let the chemicals diffuse into my blood and then float me away into the heavens Saki often spoke of.

Nah, that did not seem to work either. How about swallowing the smoke? I often heard smokers use the word "drag". So drag == swallow?

WOW. I should not have done that. It was the same old fifth class experience! Either drag!=swallow or smoking sucks for an entirely different reason now, the sharp, stinging learning curve!

There seemed to be no one online in my GTalk list to ask for advice.

WWW? By the time I finished some stupid "How To Smoke for Dummies" manual, the cigarette was dead. For good.

I entered the house with a stinking mouth. Where are the chloromints when you need them the most? I tried washing my mouth WITH soap, TWICE and yet the odour persisted. It took around five hours for my breath to become normal.

Amma was obviously mad but by then I had already made up my mind to NEVER touch a cigarette in my life again.